Showing posts with label Coping with Mood Swings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Coping with Mood Swings. Show all posts

Friday, June 13, 2008

Lack of Motivation : How to motivate myself when going through depression

How do you motivate yourself when you go through depression? Or how do you cope with a lack of motivation to do things?

With bipolar disorder (manic-depressive illness), whenever I am well or hypomanic, I enjoy my family, church, work, photography, briskwalkings, making homemade bookmarks and other crafts and gifts, writing, blogging, etc.

But when I go through a relapse of clinical depression, all my motivation to do things seemed to disappear! Do you experience this too?

I felt extremely tired and easily tired. I have no heart nor energy to do anything. Waking up each morning seemed to be most difficult. I dread to wake up to face another day. I don't think I have the energy to face another day.

When severely depressed, it takes a lot to effort to even attend to basic general hygiene. I remembered days when I go without bathing or washing my face!

Eating takes too much effort as I don't have appetite. Exercise became extremely difficult because I was too tired.

Actually during clinical depression, it was due to the chemical imbalance in my brain that I am not able to enjoy anything in general.

But when I am not doing very much, I began to believe that I am useless, ineffective, inadequate, helpless and incapable of achieving anything. These negative thoughts make me feel more discouraged and in turn reduced my ability to do things. It becomes harder and harder to wake up each morning and to attend to my usual activities. This become a visual cycle and it has been called the lethargic circuit.

How to break this lethargic circuit and derive motivation to face each day?

For me, praying to God and reading the Bible daily, is my first weapon to break this lethargic circuit. I realized that unless God gives me the grace and strength to cope, I will not have the energy nor the desire to face another day.

Thank God for His faithfulness in helping me to cope. God sent me many kind friends who prayed and encouraged me. God also led me to read useful books and articles on how to manage clinical depression.

I am learning and doing the following which is helping me to break the lethargic circuit and derive motivation to face each day and to do things:

1) I am learning to wake up at the same time each day though I dread waking up. I realized that once I am up, I am able to do some things after all. I also try to sleep at the same time every night so that I get enough sleep. Insufficient sleep or rest can worsen depression.

2) I am learning to eat my meals regularly and as nutritiously as possible. Though I don't have much appetite and eating seems to be such an effort, I realized that I need all the energy and nutrition to fight this depression and therefore I must eat! I try to eat more vegetable and fruits to gain more vitamins and nutrition.

3) I am learning to exercise regularly. Exercise seemed so difficult at first as I am so tired daily. But I am learning that exercise is important to build up my strength and stamina. So I learn to start slowly and daily. I find that as the days go by, I began able to exercise longer. My body and mind becomes stronger. Exercise release good chemicals to help us fight depression.

I enjoy briskwalking. I go for briskwalks whenever I can. Sometimes I exercise by walking on my brother's treadmill or stationery bike.

4) I am learning to create a routine. I realized that without a routine, I tend to avoid doing things as I no longer enjoy anything. This will only caused me to remain in the lethargic circuit. To break this lethargic circuit, I learn to plan my days. I schedule regular exercise and some activities that I enjoy for each day. I found that with every task that I managed to complete, I began to feel motivated to do more. I began to experience a sense of accomplishment.

5) Break tasks into smaller portions. When going through depression, every tasks seemed so difficult. It's hard to began to do anything. Procastination sets in. To avoid this, I am learning to break my tasks into smaller and more manageable portions. I try to do only a portion each day and I found that I was able to get things done slowly. This again gives me a sense of accomplishment and the motivation to do more.

6) I am learning to be patient and not to be too hard with myself. I try to remember that I am unwell now and it takes time to rebuild my body and mind. So when I failed to accomplish what I planned for the day, I learn to tell myself, it's okay. I will try harder tomorrow. Or I break the task into even smaller portions.

7) I am learning not to let my negative thoughts or feelings prevent me from daily activities. I am learning that my feelings during depression are not necessarily valid. They often have little bearing on the truth. My feelings of being too depressed to cope do not mean that I will not be able to cope when I am actually in a situation. So I am learning to ask God for strength to cope with daily challenges despite my depression.

I am thankful to God for His mercies and faithfulness in helping me to cope each day. This relapse of clinical depression is yet another learning experience for me to learn to manage my bipolar disorder better. It is also another opportunity for me to experience God's love, goodness and mercies in many wonderful ways. God's Words and His presence with me is my daily encouragement and strength.

I am also thankful to my family, my church and my friends for prayers and support. I am thankful to all of you, my dear blogging friends and visitors, for your prayers, encouragements and support in this difficult time. Thanks for all your suggestions on how to manage depression and for sharing your life and experiences with me. I have so much to learn!

How about you? How do you motivate yourself to do things when you go through depression?

Thanks for stopping by! Hope you have a blessed day.

Friday, May 30, 2008

I am with you always

Dear Friends,

Thank you very much for stopping by! Thanks for all your prayers and encouragements.

Just a short update on my current condition.

With bipolar disorder, whenever I am well, I am usually kind of hypomanic. Writing and reading is a breeze. My thoughts flow naturally and I can write a lot. I also tend to talk a lot. You can see from my past postings on this blog that I tend to post very long posts and almost every day.

But now I am rather slowed down. My thoughts are dis-jointed. My concentration level is low. Reading and writing takes much effort. Even talking is difficult. When I am a little better, I will tend to want to read, write and talk. But I will be terribly exhausted after that.

So I am coping by cutting down on activities that tire me out.

I learn to lower my expectations of self by not expecting myself to do too much during this period of time.

It is hard as I have perfectionism character trait and begin to feel a sense of uselessness.

But I try to remind myself that I am just taking a break. I can still be useful and contribute when I am better.

I try to exercise more regularly as my body has become so easily tired and lethargic.

I read the Bible and pray daily and am finding much comfort in God's Words.

I re-read this encouraging devotional from CH Spurgeon, that reminds me once again God is with me and will never leave me nor forsake me.
“I am with you alway.”
Matthew 28:20

It is well there is One who is ever the same, and who is ever with us.

It is well there is one stable rock amidst the billows of the sea of life.

O my soul, set not thine affections upon rusting, moth-eaten, decaying treasures, but set thine heart upon him who abides for ever faithful to thee.

Build not thine house upon the moving quicksands of a deceitful world, but found thy hopes upon this rock, which, amid descending rain and roaring floods, shall stand immovably secure.

My soul, I charge thee, lay up thy treasure in the only secure cabinet; store thy jewels where thou canst never lose them.

Put thine all in Christ; set all thine affections on his person, all thy hope in his merit, all thy trust in his efficacious blood, all thy joy in his presence, and so thou mayest laugh at loss, and defy destruction.

Remember that all the flowers in the world’s garden fade by turns, and the day cometh when nothing will be left but the black, cold earth.

Death’s black extinguisher must soon put out thy candle. Oh! how sweet to have sunlight when the candle is gone!

The dark flood must soon roll between thee and all thou hast; then wed thine heart to him who will never leave thee; trust thyself with him who will go with thee through the black and surging current of death’s stream, and who will land thee safely on the celestial shore, and make thee sit with him in heavenly places for ever.

Go, sorrowing son of affliction, tell thy secrets to the Friend who sticketh closer than a brother.

Trust all thy concerns with him who never can be taken from thee, who will never leave thee, and who will never let thee leave him, even “Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, and to-day, and for ever.”

“Lo, I am with you alway,” is enough for my soul to live upon, let who will forsake me.

(Taken from CH Spurgeon's Morning and Evening, 11 May, Morning)

Thanks again for stopping by!

Take care. Hope you have a blessed weekends.

I will post every now and then to let you know of my condition.

Thanks!

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Therapeutic Walks at the Beach - Another Wellness Activity

I am thankful to God that this week I am able to take a break from work. This is a much needed break and I really cherish it.

At the moment, I can't take a holiday to go out of Singapore, as I am caring for my mother. She has many medical conditions and I need to watch over her daily.

But I am thankful to God for more opportunities to go for walks this week. Walking is very therapeutic to me. Walking has become one of my most important Wellness Activity now.

I love to walk at the parks near my home or go to the beach. Walking really helps me to unwind and relax. As I walk and enjoy nature, fresh air and sunshine, I feel so much better.

As I walk, I will talk to the Lord. I am thankful that God is with me and I can enjoy this quiet walking time with Him. Walking in the parks and beach always remind me that God is all powerful and He is caring for me. I can cast all my cares and difficulties upon Him.

I am thankful to God that on Tuesday I was able to go to East Coast Beach with my good friend, BH. BH is a very sweet and gentle lady. BH knows that walks are good for me in managing my condition and she kindly offered to take me out on Tuesday. Although she has never experienced depression or bipolar before, she is very sympathetic to listen to me. She has other friends who have other form of mental illness, and I can see that BH is not judgemental. She does not condemn me for my experiences with bipolar or depression. She accepts that it is a medical condition, an illness that I need to live with and I can learn to cope by God's grace. BH prays for me whenever I am not well. I am thankful for such a friend.

Here's a video of what I saw at the Beach on Tuesday. Oh, how I love the sea! Watching the waves somehow has such a calming effect on me.

Luther said "The sea of God's mercies ought to swallow up our particular afflictions."

No matter what difficulties I am going through, it is only one drop of water in the ocean. God's mercies will swallow them up! How thankful I am that I can rest in God's love and faithfulness through all the changing scenes in life.

Thanks for stopping by!

Do you enjoy walks? Do you go for walks regularly? Have you found it therapeutic or helpful in some ways?

Hope you have a blessed day!

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

It Matters to Me about You

Today, I found this encouraging poem that reminded me afresh that God cares for me. No matter what I go through in this life, He is with me. The difficulties, trials or afflictions that pained me at times, are actually working together for my good in God's wonderful providence.

God is doing a deeper work in my soul to make me what He wants me to be. God is conforming me more and more to the image of Christ. The process is painful but necessary. This is the only way I can bear fruit for Christ.

This reminder helps me to see my difficulties and afflictions due to bipolar or depression, panic attacks, stress and other difficulties, from a different angle and to value what God is doing in me through them. It helps me to face every tomorrow with God's strength and grace.

I know God loves me and He is with me. God has His purposes in all that I am going through and He will accomplished His purposes in and through me. I am a weak vessel and an instrument in the hands of a mighty God.

I humbly submit to His will and pray that I may learn to glorify Him even in the furnace of affliction because He has promised never to leave me nor forsake me (Hebrews 13:5).

If you are going through a very difficult and painful time now or suffering in some ways, I hope this poem and the reminder that God cares for you will bring some comfort and uplift your heart to Him Who loved us and gave His Son for us for nothing shall ever separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:35-39)

IT MATTERS TO ME ABOUT YOU

My child, I know thy sorrows,
Thine every grief I share;
I know how thou art tested,
And, what is more - I care.

Think not I am indifferent
To what affecteth thee;
Thy weal and woe are matters
Of deep concern to Me.

But, child, I have a purpose
In all that I allow;
I ask thee then to trust Me,
Though all seems dark just now.

How often thou hast asked Me
To purge away thy dross!
But this refining process
Involves for thee - a cross.

There is no other pathway
If thou would'st really be
Conformed unto the image
Of Him Who died for thee.

Thou can'st not be like Jesus
Till self is crucified;
And as a daily process
The cross must be applied.

Just as the skillful gard'ner
Applies the pruning knife,
E'en so, I too would sever
The worthless from thy life.

I have but one sole object -
That thou should'st fruitful be!
And is it not thy longing
That I much fruit should see?

Then shrink not from the training
I needs must give to thee;
I know just how to make thee
What I would have thee be.

Remember that I love thee!
Think not I am unkind,
When trials come to prove thee,
And joy seems left behind.

'Tis but a little longer
Until I come again;
What now seems so mysterious
Will all be then made plain.

Take courage then; and fear not!
Press forward to the prize,
A crown of life awaits thee,
Glory before thee lies!

- Alice C. Lefroy
Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings,
and not one of them is forgotten before God?
But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.
Fear not therefore; ye are of more value than many sparrows.
(Luke 12:6,7)

This photo is taken by my brother-in-Christ, CW Fong. Thank God for his kindness to share this lovely picture with us.

Thank you for stopping by.

What do you think of this poem? Do you also see God's works in your life through your trials, pains and sufferings? Can you find comfort in God's love even through your difficulties or sufferings?

Take care. Have a blessed day!

Coping with Panic Attacks

Thank God for giving me a good rest. I woke up today feeling very refreshed!

Thank God that the effect of the panic attack yesterday have finally subsided. This is the first time I have felt the effect of the panic attack almost for a whole day. Hmm... maybe this is a sign that my nervous system is getting weaker. I need to be careful to manage the stress and strain so that my condition will not worsen.

Thank God for discipline to take a break yesterday and rest so that my condition can stabilised. I prayed and read God's Words, and found much encouragement. I also listened to some instrumental music. They are very relaxing and soothing.

I used to take long walks along the beach and listen to instrumental music on my portable mp3 player whenever I am very stressed up with work. My old workplace was near a beach.

So yesterday, I laid down on my couch and closed my eyes while I listened to the instrumental music. I imagined that I was walking along the beach and watching the sea and the waves. I missed the beach! Somehow walking along the beach and watching the sea and waves have a calming effect on me. I am reminded that God Who creates the Heavens and earth, created me, loves me and will take care of me.

Thank God that today I feel ready to face a new day.

Thanks for stopping by. Hope you have a blessed day!

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Blogging - Another therapeutic activity for me to cope with depression and bipolar mood swings

Dear Reader,

Do you enjoy blogging? What makes you start your blog? Or if you are a visitor without a blog, what makes you return to read someone's blog? What makes you come back to read my blog?


I thankful to God for enabling me to start this blog around February this year ie. February 2008. I have found blogging to be very therapeutic to me in my coping with my depression and my bipolar mood swings. And thank God this blog also benefits other readers as well.

I write quite regularly, as you can see. Partly because I love writing and it helps me to cope with my depression or manic due to bipolar disorder. Partly also because I desire to share with others my life experiences and God's goodness to me, as well as resources that I have found useful to manage depression and bipolar disorder or Bible verses/sermons/books/other articles I have read and found useful.

Blogging enables me to share my thoughts and feelings and to kind of release them. Sometimes by doing so, I can see things from a different perspective. When others visit my blog and left their comments, they also helped me in many ways. Comments usually bring cheers. Sometimes a short comment left by someone can really make my day :-)

I used to write long emails or letters to friends before I started blogging. Yes, I write letters :-) I am one of those old-fashioned, rare specifies. I know few people in the modern world today write letters. But I do. And I love doing so.

But one complain I often get when I write letters or emails to people and I suspect even when I post on my blog ;-) is that I write too long. I am too long-winded, they said :-) Hmm... I don't quite know how to handle this. I always feel I have so much to say and writing short messages can't quite express how I feel. There was one incident in the past, when I got scolded by a friend for writing long emails to her. She said she is too busy and have no time to read my emails :-( Now I hardly write to my friends as most of them do not reply. I am not sure whether they got the mails, whether they read them or they find them burdensome. Just waiting for a reply from them can sometimes almost drive me crazy! Now I am corresponding only with a handful of friends who haven't got tired of my writings yet :-)

Most of the time, I am sharing my thoughts and feelings and resources on this blog almost daily. And I also visit my blogging friends as often as I can. In the blogging world, I feel accepted and appreciated. Besides this blog which is my personal online diary, I have another blog which is dedicated solely to Resources I have found useful on the internet on managing depression, bipolar plus some personal growth articles. I also have some other hobbies blogs where I share my passion on making bookmarks, homemade crafts and gifts, photography, Christian articles/books and my freelance work. I am active mainly on this blog as I use it as an online journal or diary and almost daily I record my thoughts and feelings here.

Actually, I didn't know what is a blog or what is blogging until quite recently. You might laugh. But when I first started this blog, I still didn't know much about blogging. I just wanted to share my story and useful resources with others. A brother-in-Christ suggested this idea to me. I have a website but hardly anyone seems to be visiting and so I decided to try blogging instead as it is free.

When I first started this blog, I wasn't quite sure what I can or cannot put on my blog. I also wasn't sure what I can or cannot write on others' blog comment. I was a little fearful of "breaking the rules" of blogging.

One of my brothers, Daniel, has been blogging since a few years back and I visited his blog on and off. He is in Malaysia and he shares his life and activities on his blog. He is quite a funny person and so he posts all kinds of things on his blog and I always laughed when I visited his blog. So I read his blog on and off but I have no idea what blogging is really all about.

Recently, when Daniel visited me, he finally gave me the definition for a blog! He said a short and sweet definition for a blog is "An Online Diary". Daniel said my blog is my online diary and I can blog about anything I want. I can write anything that I want to write and share with the public. He reminded me that what I write on my blog is on a public domain. So he said, don't post anything that you don't want others to know ;-)

Daniel also said there is no hard and fast rule on posting comments on others' blogs. The owner of the blogs have every right not to publish any comments if they prefer not to. Same thing for me. I can choose not to publish any comments that I don't wish to.

I thank God for the wonderful experience I have had since I started blogging in February. I have enjoyed sharing my life experiences, God's goodness to me, and the resources I found helpful to me or the Bible verses/books I read with others.

One the greatest blessing I derived from blogging is that I have been able to "meet" many friends through the world of blogging. I have never expected this at all! I am learning new things daily from my blogging friends. I love to read and write. And in some sense, I have found "like-minded" people. My blogging friends are from different parts of the world and they blog about any topics under the sun :-)

I am thankful too for a few Penpals I have "met" through blogging! This is wonderful. I used to have penpals when I was a teenager. And now having penpals again when I am forty++ is really nice :-) Thanks for writing to me, dear Penpals :-)


Here's a big "THANK YOU" to you, dear Reader, who are reading my blog. Thank you for stopping by. I hope what you are reading here on this blog are helping you in some ways.

And a big "THANK YOU" too to all of you, my dear Blogging Friends, for visiting me whenever you can and leaving me kind comments to share your thoughts and feelings with me after you read my posts, or just to let me know you have visited. Thanks to all of you!

And a big "THANK YOU" also to all of you, my dear Penpals, for writing to me and choosing me as you Penpal :-)

One thing I found that is helpful in blogging is to try and remember to leave a comment whenever possible. It seems to bring some encouragement to fellow bloggers to know that what they have posted has helped others or to hear opinions others have. Or maybe just to know someone cares and have visited them. So I hope you don't mind me leaving my comments all over your blogs when I visit your blogs :-)

Oops, here I go again. I think I am getting too long-winded again :-)

Today, I thank God for all of you and for the way He is making my life more colourful through blogging.

Thanks for stopping by. Do leave me a comment, if you can, to share your thoughts and feelings with me! It makes my day :-)




This is meant to make you laugh :P


Hope you have a blessed day!


Take care.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Therapeutic Walks and Photography to cope with Depression or Bipolar Mood Swings

Recently, I was feeling rather tired and stressed up after several weeks of manic plus stress at work, etc etc. I could feel that my moods were swinging. When I am too tired or stressed up, my moods tend to drop. Having a mood disorder like Bipolar Disorder, I realized that I need to take steps to slow down and prevent these mood swings to either escalate into manic or plunged me into depression. I realized that in the past because I failed to notice my mood swings or indicators that I am overly stressed or strained, over a period of time I eventually plunged into severe clinical depression that can last for 3 to 6 months or longer.

I am learning now to recognize early signs and symptoms of possible relapses or trigger factors to depression or mood swings. I am learning to manage stress better and if necessary to cut down on stress level by eliminating the things that are stressing me up. So I have cut down on some activities and scheduled more down time. I also turned down freelance assignments which I don't time I can manage or complete on time.

I cut down a little on blogging. But I found that as blogging is therapeutic to me, it's hard to really take a complete break. I love to write and writing is therapeutic to me. So I am still blogging and sharing my thoughts, feelings, experiences and what I read or find useful. Visiting my blogging friends and having them visit me is a means of support to me. This is a crucial part of my recovery and maintenance of mental well-being.

I also need to do things that will help me to relax and cheer me up. Besides praying and reading God's Words, and rest, I have been able to spend some time with some hobbies. Some activities that I have found to be therapeutic are taking walks to enjoy nature and develop my interest in photography.

So recently, I took a walk past Woodlands Town Garden which is adjacent to Bukit Timah Expressway. I didn't really go into the Garden because I was alone and I didn't want to walk alone there. Although Singapore is a safe place, it is still not wise to go to quiet places alone. So I admired the Garden from the exterior surroundings :-)

If you go to Woodlands Town Garden, you can enjoy the greenery and the unique design of the park amenities which has both Malay and Chinese elements. Sungei Mandai Kecil, a river that flows through the park, was also integrated in the design of the park. Part of this river that flows into the park was enlarged into a lake, irregularly-shaped for a natural look.

I enjoy photography a lot and so I took that opportunity to catch a few shots :-)

I really enjoy nature a lot and I love to walk or go briskwalkings. I hope I can schedule more such time as it is always refreshing to me.

How about you? Do you go for walks? What do find to be therapeutic when you are feeling down or stressed up?



















Thursday, April 3, 2008

Learning to cope with stress and mood swings of bipolar (manic and depression)

Recently, I have been feeling very very tired and easily stressed. I believe this is partly due to effect of being rather manic for some weeks prior to this and also partly because I have taken on some freelance assignments which are mentally taxing and with rather tight deadlines. I am also having to manage some other personal and family matters. These can be rather overwhelming. I just realized that I have been having more on my plates than I can managed!

I was feeling rather down for a few days as I was very very tired. I prayed daily for God's grace and strength. Thank God for His mercies and faithfulness. I am learning to cope through the following ways:

1) I look to God daily in prayers and reading of the Bible. When I feel overwhelmed and sad, I pour out my heart to the Lord in prayers. I told him of how tired I felt and how discouraged at times. Sometimes I felt a sense of uselessness and a dread to face the challenges ahead of me. I felt so weak and without strength to carry on. I am beginning to realize that these are signs that I am overly stressed and strain, and may lead to an episode of severe depression soon if not manage carefully.

I fear relapse of severe depression as they zapped me of all my energy and I can't enjoy God, the Bible, worship, my family, my church, my friends, my work, my hobbies, etc etc. Thank God that He bids us to come unto Him when we are weary and heavy laden and He will give us rest. I told the Lord my fear and pray that He may preserve me and help me to cope. I found encouragement in the singing of Psalm 130 that reminds me that I can cry unto the Lord from out of the depths I am in and He will hear and answer my prayers, and deliver me in His time. The song "Because He Lives" also brings great comfort and assurance to me. Because our Lord Jesus Christ suffered, died and arose again, and He is living and in control, and He loves me, I can face tomorrow in His strength and grace. Thank God that He can still any storm in my life! Thank God for giving me peace as I learn to cast my cares upon Him. My flesh and my heart fails, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.

2) I am learning to recognize early symptoms of being overly stressed and dangerous mood swings which may either escalate into manic or spiral down into depression. I am learning to realize the importance of not overlooking these but at the same time not to be too discouraged by these. I am learning to accept that these are part and parcel of bipolar which needs to be carefully managed. I can learn to manage it by looking to God and prayerfully using whatever helps and means available. I can still live a meaningful and useful life.

Everyone experience mood swings every now and then, but the tricky part about depression or bipolar is how to manage it and prevent as afar as possible from getting too manic or falling into severe depression. Even if I do fall into severe depression, I hope I will remember that it will pass away and I will be better again. It is hard during severe depression to remember what it is like to be well. I hope this blog and what I have written when I am well, will remind me of it.

One of the best coping strategies, suggested by professionals and patients alike, is using a mood chart to track my own episodes and symptoms. I am using a Mood Diary to keep track of my mood swings. Some charts I found to be helpful in tracking moods or lifestyles are:

a. Mood Diary (mooddiary.pdf)

b. Here is another Booklet from DBSA with some explanations and charts for Lifestyle and Mood Tracking (lifestyle-and-mood-tracking.pdf)

c. Here is a helpful tool to use for Healthy Lifestyle Tracking with the emphasize on Sleep, Nutrition, Exercise, Relaxation, Comfort and Self-Expression, Relationships (healthylife.pdf.)

3) I am taking my medication regularly. I am taking 100mg Lamictal (Lamotrigine) which is a mood stabiliser and 25mg Seroquel (Quetiapine) which is an anti-psychotic, daily. My pdoc said these will help to stabilise my mood on the longer run as I learn to manage triggering factors.

4) I am endeavouring to eat regularly and more healthily. I eat a variety of fruits and vegetables daily to get enough vitamins. I am also taking Omega-3 supplements regularly which is supposed to be helpful in stabilising mood disorders in long run.

5) I am trying hard to sleep at regular hours though I am tempted to work beyond my sleeping hours. I am learning to slow down now. I think with enough rest for my body and mind, plus healthy food for my body, it will be able to cope better with the various challenges.

6) I am making time to exercise every morning. I have not been able to continue my membership with the Women's Gym after the trial membership expired in mid-Feb because they have decided to change their opening hours. I prefer to go to the Gym in the early mornings as it helps to strengthen me for the daytime. Now, I try to go for brisk walkings whenever I can and do some simple exercise at home.

7) I am learning to cope with stress. I hate stress but I know we cannot avoid stress. Unless I learn to manage stressful situations in my life, I will always be overwhelmed by it.

I thank God for friends and family's advice and brain storming. Thank God that providentially, I need not do one of my freelance assignments which is very stressful due to its volumn as well as tight deadline. Although this mean a great loss of income, I am glad I can keep my sanity! I realized that I cannot take on freelance assignments that are too difficult and strenous, or mentally too straining and stressful, with too tight deadlines. I will burn myself out and it is not worth the money. My health is more important.

I am also learning to use a Diary to plan my time and tasks daily, set my priorities and break down difficult items into smaller and more manageable portions. I marked down dates of various appointments and deadlines of my freelance assignments, so that I don't missed them out. I list out items I need to work on daily, and I check them out whenever they are completed. There is a sense of accomplishment when I finished a small tasks.

I am learning to take one day at a time! Hard lesson to learn as I tend to do 101 things at the same time :-)

8) I am learning to plan some time either along the day or at least once a week, to take a break from my daily routine and to have some form of recreations. All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy :-) I need some form of breaks and recreations, to recharge my batteries!

I am enjoying photography whenever I have opportunity to go out. I am also enjoying making bookmarks using the photographs I have taken and giving them to my church members and friends. These are rather therapeutic to me.

I am also learning to take short breaks throughout the day to stretch myself and take a drink, or sometimes a quick nap when I need them. These takes a lot of discipline too as I tend to be very engrossed in my tasks.

9) I am learning to open myself up and share with my family, church and friends when I am troubled or perplexed or too stress. Often others can see things more clearly than me and can help me to see things from a right perspective and manage them better. Thank God for family and friends who have helped me recently to manage some stressful and difficult situations in my life.

I am thankful for opportunities to go out for a meal with my friend or to go Prayer Meeting together. These help to break from my routines and are refreshing to me.

I am thankful for this blog where I can use like a Journal or Online Diary to express my thoughts and feelings. It is therapeutic for me to verbalise my thoughts and feelings whether they be happy or sad ones. I am glad that I can express myself in this way and need not put on a mask. And I am thankful for church friends and blogging friends who care for me and willing to read my thoughts and feelings and pray for me and encourage me, or make suggestion on how I can cope.

And I am so thankful to God to be supported by so many of you, my dear blogging friends! It is such a great blessing from God that though we may never meet on this earth, we can pray, encourage and support one another through the various challenges we face here. These are tokens of God's goodness and mercies to me, and I praise Him!

10) I am learning to recognize when my thoughts began to turn negative and eats into me. When my moods spiral down, if I don't recognize it, it will overwhelm me. My thoughts became rather negative recently and I started to feel very down for many days. Thank God for sending family, church members and blogging friends who reminded me of God, His love and mercies and ways to manage my condition. Some helped me to identify faulty or unhelpful thinking patterns or behaviours, and how to rectify them.

Thank God that my thoughts are clearer now and I am feeling so much better! I know I still need to be very prayerful and vigilant. I am comforted that the Lord has provided me with people who loved and cared for me, and also provided much help to manage my conditions. I know I must learn to look to Him and use these means for my well being.


Thanks and praise to God for His goodness and mercies in helping me to learn to cope. There is so much I am learning daily and seems to have to keep relearning some of these things, and reapply them. Thank God for grace and strength.

Thank God for His presence with me and encouragements through His Words. And thanks again to all of you for your prayers, support and encouragements.